the mental game of running

When I started training for this half-marathon back in June, I could not run a mile. I had to work my way from walking to jogging to running. For almost two months I trained myself to go from nothing to 3 miles. That was tough. I thought, "how can I run a half marathon if I can't even run a mile without stopping to walk?!?" I trained about 4 days a week and stuck to that pretty strictly. And I did it.

Once I was at 3 miles, it was onto the rigorous 6 day a week training. My training included short runs, long runs, cross training and strength training. It added a mile to my distance bi-weekly, until 5 miles, when it started adding a mile weekly. Seven miles is when I hurt my knee and took a few weeks off. Coming back has been surprisingly easier than I thought, and today I ran 8 miles. My training before the actual race day is only 10 miles. They say the last 3 miles the day of the marathon is pure adrenaline. So I will get myself to 10 miles by next Wednesday and then the 13.1 miles will be on Sunday, Oct. 19.

Running has been a completely new and challenging experience for me. It been a total mental game. I used to have a VERY bad habit of starting something and not finishing it, and in my quest to break that habit, I decided to commit to this half- marathon. I did it because it was something I knew I couldn't do without a tough, long training that I would HAVE to stick to to be able to accomplish it. It was a mental game. If I can do this, I can do anything. I almost gave up. I had the perfect excuse and opportunity to quit. I hurt my knee and got sick. No one would blame me... it was out of my control. But as I sat on my couch feeling like crap, I could not STAND the thought of not completing this race. I knew I had to PUSH myself and somehow do this. Thats when I began praying about it too.

So I have made it 8 miles and as I was running today I realized that when pushing your body like that your body and your mind go through crazy phases. I decided to write about it and break it down by mile.

Mile 1-3: 

These are the HARDEST miles for me! When I start out I'm ok, but when I get to about .5 to 1.5 I think to myself, I can't do this. I'm already tired and pushing it. How and I going to do this?? Around 2.5 it starts getting easier and the mental thoughts change to... ok, I'm getting this. I'm doing ok.

Mile 3: Mile 3 is the one that I begin to visualize crossing the finish line. Maybe thats because in my daily runs, mile 3 is down Grandview Ave and there are always a lot of people. So maybe thats why I associate mile 3 with a "crowd"?? Either way thats what gets me through mile 3.

Mile 4 and 5:

Auto-pilot. By this point I have my pace and I'm just running without even thinking about it. Nothing hurts, my breathing is controlled, and I really don't need to visualize anything to get me through these miles. These two are my easiest.

Mile 6:

Mile 6 is when I start looking at the pavement in front of me and stop looking forward. Looking forward makes me tired and puts in my mind... "oh my gosh I still have that much farther to go?!?". I have to look at the ground during mile 6 and usually 7. Mile 6 is also when I begin to visualize why I am doing this. I begin to "talk" to myself in my mind. I think about cancer a lot. I think about ALL of the people in my life who have been affected by cancer. My thoughts turn to Michael, Yesenia (Chris' wife), Nate, Dev, Josh and Austin. Three of the six people I think about have lost their battle with this disease and I think.... "run Anya run. You can do it and they cant. Run." I almost get mad. I think about running that marathon wearing STUPID CANCER on my shirt and I know how many people along the route will be able to identify with that. Because cancer effects everyone. At some point, unfortunately cancer will effect everyone in some way or another. So mile 6 is the "in memory of.." mile. 

Mile 7:

Around 6.5 to 7 is when I really have to start pushing my body. This is where it starts to become more physical than mental. My breathing is still controlled but the breaths are stronger and deeper. This is when my feet start hurting too. The arches are where I notice it the most. And my hip. That starts hurting here too. This is also when I start to look ahead again. I begin to visualize the last mile. Seeing as how up to this point I have only gone 8 miles, mile 7 is close to the end. This is also when I tell myself, "you've come this far... keep going". I am pushing my body more and more going from 7 to 8.

Mile 8:

HAHA... this was funny today. I could not get this stupid grin off my face. I was SO proud of myself for getting to mile 8 that I could not stop smiling. Mile 8 hurt. My body hurt and I could feel my body temp rising. My breathing was less controlled and I actually felt out of breath. I had to push myself through mile 8. I was tired. Finishing mile 8 was amazing though. To this point, it was the longest I had gone. And thats when it turned mental again. I began to think... "I have gone 8, I will train for the next 5 days and will be ready for 10!" And 10 is the "training" goal. Once I run 10 miles, I will have DONE it! Not the race, but the training. The last 3 miles on race day are adrenaline, but what is more of an accomplishment to me is that I went from 0 to 10! I committed to and STUCK WITH a 12 week training. My pay off is not on October 19. It's on the day I run 10 miles and COMPLETE what I began. 

13.1 on October 19 will just be an added bonus. :o)