the "ah ha" moment

it's interesting and scary when you come to a realization in your life that could potentially change it. i have had something on my mind for a long time, probably since before michael died. going through something like what we went through truly changes your perspective on life. your priorities are different and life takes on new meaning. suddenly things that seemed so important before become petty and meaningless. you begin to see the "bigger picture" and you are more willing to listen to the still small voice inside of you telling you to "go for it". so... i did...

over the past two years, working at saks fifth avenue, as a hair stylist and now at aveda, i have become more and more distant from the passion i once had for the beauty industry. i have worked in cosmetic retail or a salon for almost 9 years. i loved working behind the chair, don't get me wrong. that is where i got to connect with people, and i mean truly connect with them. i learned so much from my clients, and i hope i gave them the same in return. i was able to share in their life with them, and they certainly followed along beside me in my journey. those are life lessons i will carry with me forever. 

something hit me today though like a brick wall. as i was sitting in an eight hour training class on "retail verbiage" and the proper ways to contour eye make-up, i realized that  i no longer have the passion, nor the desire to be in the beauty industry. i'm done. it was good for a time, and will always be a fun hobby or something to play around with, but it's time to move on. i sat there today and thought; in the grand scheme of life, is the right shade of lip-stick really going to make that big of difference? am i really going to make a difference in someone's life by saying "aroma" vs. "perfume? will it fulfill me and what i want to get out of life? no. not anymore. i'm ready for more. i'm ready to move on. i'm ready to close that chapter in my life, and start a new one...