Is checking-in causing us to check-out? Logan Daily News version

Here's the article that was published in this weeks Logan Daily News. Its a shorter version of a previous posting,

Is “checking-in” causing us to “check-out”?

By: Anya Sattely

Try to recall your last evening out. Have you noticed that smart phones seem to be just another piece of our table setting now? Do we consciously think about how many times we check our Twitter account or update our Facebook status during the course of that 40-minute meal? Chances are we "check-in" and "tag" our dinner date before we are even seated. We update our status to let everyone know how amazing our salad is and take an artsy Instagram picture of our tiramisu. By the end of our dinner that 4-inch piece of aluminum and glass has probably been turned on more times than our waitress has been back to check on us.

Six months ago that was me. Everywhere I went and everything I did involved social media. Let me start off by saying that I am a self-proclaimed Facebook junkie. I love being able to interact with hundreds of people at any given moment. I love posting status updates of the exciting, and not-so-exciting adventures I encounter as a new parent. I like to see what’s going on in other people’s lives. I like to share projects, ideas, plans and general life happenings. Heaven forbid anything ever happen to my

smartphone, because all of our family photos, baby's firsts, addresses, phone numbers, emails, emergency contacts and scrapbook worthy moments were in that phone.

You can see why I thought my husband had fallen off of his rocker when he suggested we get rid of our smart phones and go back to the old talk and text phones. Are you kidding me, I thought? How would I make plans? How would I share my day? People wouldn't be able to see what I was doing exactly when I wanted them to see it. I thought, there's no way I am going to give up a window seat to the inner most thoughts and actions of those around me; at least the ones they wanted me to see.

We did indeed end up giving up our phones. Since then I have become increasingly aware of what a hold social media has placed on our lives. Instead of living in the moment, we have become obsessed with promoting the moment.

I'd like to say that my compulsive action towards social media has decreased since getting rid of our smartphones, but it has not. I often feel obligated to post, update, comment and “like”. Is this what Facebook was suppose to be? Was the plan for us to become so attached to our computers and phones that we become detached from real life and real events?

In addition to consuming our time and energy, social media has allowed us to see the portrayed perfection in others' lives, causing a dangerous self-criticizing attitude in our own lives. How many times have I been struggling with a rough mommy moment only to escape to Facebook or Pinterest and feel that much more inadequate because of what I see other moms posting?

My husband and I were having a conversation about what social media has become and how the use of it has affected our family. One of the things he mentioned was, "We can be in the same room together watching a movie, but you are usually on the computer as well and it's like you aren't really even there with me." I could not escape the truth in his words.

In order to regain a healthy balance in life, maybe we should consider taking a few social media breaks from time to time. I can certainly see the benefit in staying connected online with friends and loved ones far away, but I think more of us are longing for and needing a real life connection as well. Lets take the initiative to update a friend over coffee or a shared meal, instead of a publicly broadcasted network. Lets be intentional about what we put our time and energy into and be void of the distractions that take us away from what really matters our lives.